So much to be thankful for!

Happy Thanksgiving Day 2010!

Today I have so much to be thankful for. Two beautiful, happy, healthy little girls. My mom is still alive and well, in fact HER mom is still alive and well. I have a good job in a time when any kind of job is hard to come by, let alone a good one. I have health insurance and good doctors. I have food to eat, clean water to drink, a car that works pretty well, even if it does have its kinks. I have a wonderful church home, good friends and a God who loves me more than I could ever imagine. I am overflowing with thankfulness right now!
If you are having trouble finding a reason to be thankful, think of all the people in the world that don't have a bite to eat today, a day when we normally gorge ourselves to the point of feeling sick. That puts some perspective on things, doesn't it? Blessings to all!

Music

Been pretty crazy around here lately. I've gone to a couple different Christian concerts and I've loved them. I went to my favorite group, Casting Crowns at the end of October. Then I got a free ticket to a tour by some newer artists. I have fallen in love with the music of JJ Heller! Such pure notes and I think it's absolutely awesome that she and her husband get to do what they love together! They are amazingly talented with writing and both have incredible voices! You must check out some of her (their) songs on youtube!

What a Difference a Year Makes

I almost passed this day by without realizing what it was. I mean, I realized a couple of weeks ago when my daughter told me she had a play this night, but today it wasn't until my brother said something about it that I realized what today was. It is a year since the divorce.
I must say I lost some unexpected things this year. I lost some weight, but gained some back and I'm working on losing again and this time for good! There was a person that was good to me, but in the craziness of trying to figure out the whole new life I had, something happened. I'm not exactly sure how it started, but that relationship crumbled quite quickly. I love that person, I miss that person, I forgive that person for the things done against me, as I'm pretty sure they also forgive me for the things on my part. The very sad thing is I am left with little to no ability to trust, so as much as I miss that person, I just can't mend that bridge right now.
I also have been given the opportunity to start new on so many levels. I have found an excellent new church. I have never felt so much at home and they have helped me break down the walls of judgment I learned to build. I don't find myself judging others like I used to (which was a lot). I also stopped judging myself. God is a God of love and that's what he wants me to feel from Him! I have found a new love for reading. I must say I have NEVER been a big fan of reading, but in the last year I have finished off at least a book a month, if not more. The really odd thing is I currently have 3 books I'm reading simultaneously and one waiting to be read (don't think I can handle more than 3). I have learned to love people I couldn't stand before as well, but that's only because I chose to get to know them better and stop judging them based on what others said about them.
I must say, I am a lot happier now, my kids are happier and I get the breaks I always needed and wanted. I have changed my priorities and my days off in accordance to that change. I put my kids ahead of anyone else and part of that is making sure I get them to church as well as have a night or two off where we can just spend time together. Sure, that isn't too friendly on the pocketbook, but I wouldn't trade it! I love Tuesdays! I also love Saturdays when I have them with me and we can make new memories.
Well, speaking of memories, my oldest has a school play tonight. I better get some rest so I can be awake enough to man the video camera!

Learning to Love

I have spent a lifetime so far having a misconception of the word LOVE. I have learned that it is super important to tell those you love that you love them. As one of my best friends goes through one of the roughest birthdays ever after having lost her mom to the same type of cancer that took my step-dad, I am telling her repeatedly that I love her. I don't want her to look around and think no one is there. I want her to know I am here, every step of the way, as much as I possibly can be. I got to hold her as she cried the other day and tell her then that I loved her and that God knows her pain and HE loves her too!
I cannot say for sure what has led to me having a better understanding of love. In fact, I don't think it could be pinpointed as just one or just a few things. It's the entirety of my life and my experiences that have brought me to this point. It is realizing that life is short and we need to make sure our loved ones know that they are loved. I am reading a book by Mary Beth Chapman called Choosing to SEE. For those who don't know who that is, she is Steven Curtis Chapman's wife and the mother to little Maria Chapman  that died tragically in May 2008. It is a blessing to read and a reminder that even those we look at and think have all the time in the world (because they're so young) may not even have tomorrow.
Then I look at why I should love. The answer is simple, yet sometimes difficult to live out to others...because God loved me first. I look at the things that God has forgiven and say, "Wow, I've been forgiven of a lot." That helps me to forgive others and when I am forgiving of others, it is easier for me to love them. If I am going to hold bitterness in my heart, then it is going to be hard to love anyone. So, now, at nearly 30 years old, I am finally learning to love. Thank you Pastor Tom and the members of OHBC for showing me the love of God and teaching me to love others.

Sara Groves

I recently bought an album by her and I've loved listening to it. She's got to be at the top of my list of favorite artists right now. I have found a couple of songs that I really adore, they speak to me about relationships and how God can make you grow even through the toughest storms in life.

Tornado


Less Like Scars


God is leading me into true forgiveness and helping to heal the scars from my past! Our God is an AWESOME God!!